May 2013
4 posts
The Prettiest Little Sex Shop Ever
Today, May 3, is Feminique’s 5th birthday. It was 5 years ago today that I opened the doors of what would become a center for political trouble making, social innovation, and sex-positive thought. Scroll down for a pictorial history of the past 1,825 days at 104 N. Church Street, and the evolution of Feminique from the first slap of pink paint to the recent $10,000 renovation. It...
A Productive, Nurturing, Positive Place Actually...
I’m kind of obsessed with facebook, and that’s because while for some people facebook exists as a venue for drama and narcissism, I’ve used it to create a space that is productive, nurturing, and affirming. I’ve been working on it for years, and I’m happy to say, I feel successful that I have actually created a positive sanctuary on the internet. It’s small, but...
I know... I owe you stories
I know I’m backed up on stories I promised- Feminique renovations, Vagina Monologues, Sex Week with MTV, and my wedding. Working on those ASAP :) Thanks for following along!
May is National Masturbation Month!
Get celebrating! I’m offering $10 off all vibrators. Online only. Enter code MAY at checkout here.
April 2013
11 posts
Domestic Abuse Out Front of My House... AGAIN
My facebook status at 12:55 am:
If there could be one weekend in which I did not have to intervene on and call the police on a domestic dispute outside of my bedroom window, that would be great. I have fucking had it with these men abusing, belittling, screaming at, cursing at, threatening, and physically assaulting their girlfriends out front of my house. This guy was a real sweetheart and...
Gender Scripts
It came to my attention that yesterday, my husband attended a baby shower while I worked all day. That’s how we do gender in my house. He was wearing jeans and sneaks. I wore a dress with pink flowers on it. That’s also how we do gender in my house. Kinda awesome to be able to follow the scripts, or not, as it suits us.
Last Day of Sex Week and 75% off Sale!!
Today is the last, but BIGGEST day of SEX WEEK. That’s because it’s Feminique’s 5th birthday party. From 11-7pm we’re celebrating in our usual way, with free food (soft pretzels shaped like genitals!) and register roulette where you’re purchase will be anything from 10-75% off- no exceptions- LELO vibes, our hot new lingerie- EVERYTHING. We practically give our...
If Katelyn Campbell's story bothers you, it's time...
Did you hear about Katelyn Campbell, the high school senior who refused to attend the slut-shaming, factually-inaccurate, religiously- based abstinence-only lecture put on by her public school with conservative speaker Pam Stenzel? And did you hear how after she complained, her principal purportedly threatened to call the college where she’d been accepted for the fall and tell them she has...
SEX WEEK and why West Chester is the worst....
If you come here regularly, you know that I run my sexology work, my feminist sex shop and education center, as well as my home base for writing sex columns and speaking and lecturing about sexuality, out of a small town called West Chester, PA. Outwardly, West Chester is a rad place- it’s a college town and has a bustling downtown community with lots of trendy bars, restaurants, and...
SEX WEEK West Chester April 22-27
Celebrate Feminique’s 5th birthday with a week of open-to-the-public, pay-what-you-can events! All events start at 7:15pm and have a suggested donation of $15, but feel free to contribute less or more as you are able. Mon, April 22: “Virgins and Sluts.” Explore the two boxes of female sexuality from a historical context, from the hanging of the bloody marital bed sheets in the public...
Women Love Big Cock, Says Science!
The news media is particularly bad at reporting on scientific inquiry. Science is complex and doesn’t make for a discussionless, sellable sound bite. But that certainly doesn’t stop the media from trying. It’s exactly like this PhD Comic:
Here’s the text if you can’t read the picture:
1. Scientists publish in academic journal “Conclusion: A is correlated...
We all started as an orgasm :)
I think that’s beautiful. We don’t appreciate this fact enough.
West Chester community production of the Vagina...
You do not want to miss West Chester’s first community production of the Vagina Monologues, which will be held tomorrow, April 7, at Jazmine Thai restaurant (344 W Gay St West Chester, PA 19380)
A $10 donation will get you a ticket. Proceeds are to benefit the Crime Victims Center of Chester County, an organization like the fire department in that you hope you’ll never need...
Gender and Bystander Intervention
Last May, Ryan knocked a guy out to prevent him from further assaulting a woman out front of our apartment. That guy ended up being sentenced to 3-36 months (read: 3 years!) in jail. Last Sunday, as we were driving to Easter dinner, he used a hammer to smash open the windshield of an overturned vehicle on the side of the highway to free a woman who was trapped inside. That’s twice in one...
Help Me With Sexual Assault Awareness Month
For me, every day is sexual assault awareness day. But there is an official designated time to raise awareness, and funds, for this fundamentally important cause, and that is the month of April!
Every April 1 I donate a percentage of the proceeds from that day’s sales at Feminique to the Men Can Stop Rape charity.
This year, I’m donating 25% of every purchase from my website today to...
March 2013
9 posts
9 Steps of a Sex Controversy. Now This Sounds...
In response to a workshop I presented at Yale University, I got a lot of this:
Followed by a lot of this:
and now… hand written notes and money. I can’t help but notice that these were the steps that were followed the first time I had a sex controversy. I wrote a book about it so I remember the steps well. It’s as if there’s a formula:
1. You’re...
No Outlet?
I was driving to the Penn State Brandywine campus this evening for the Vagina Monologues. I go to campuses for their V-Day productions and build excitement for the event by engaging in sex-positive dialogue with those waiting to buy tickets for the show.
On the way, I took a wrong turn on a dead end street. The “no outlet” road was blocked by a gate, and on the side of the road was a...
My favorite email from Hannity's fan club
I’ve gotten a number of emails after the Hannity snub yesterday. This one’s my fav.
It’s from Lisa Dalia at delbartonmom2008@aol.com and reads in case you can’t see the screen shot:
Your attitude and incorrect beliefs about sex are just incpmprehensible and mind blowing. That you would actually believe sex is just supposed to be fun is why so many like minded people...
America's War on Sexual Freedom: Exhibit A
A headline in Canada yesterday:
Meanwhile in the United States, there was this headline yesterday:
I can’t with this place anymore. I just can’t.
That Time I Snubbed Sean Hannity on Live National...
Oh this story makes me laugh.
I was minding my own business at work this afternoon when I get a call from the producer to Sean Hannity’s radio show asking if I’d come on to talk about Beyonce’s use of the word “bitch” in her newest song and the feminist dialogue around reclaiming this word, Snap Chat and use among teens to spread sexually explicit images of their...
That Time I Got Death Threats and Eloped in the...
You know it’s an intense week when your marriage is the second most exciting thing that happened :/
Long story short, last week I presented a workshop at Yale University- one that I have done a dozen times. A right-wing blogger posing as a reporter asked me about it, took information from the Yale student newspaper about some of what was discussed at the event, and spun a story that I came...
In Other News...
I’m getting married on Friday!
If by "misery" you mean "orgasms", "awesomeness",...
I went to my car at 7:45 this morning and found this note on my windshield:
It says:
“We’re praying for you. Repent of your filthy business and the misery it spreads.”
Oh West Chester, Pennsylvania, why are you such a square?
Don't Take Your Status Quo Acceptance Out On Me
Trigger Warning: For images of violence, mistreatment of people with disabilities, extreme sexism, racism, and homophobia.
I was having a conversation on my sexologist facebook page about the “I Saw Your Boobs” song at the Oscars, and how I thought it was in very poor taste because 5 of the referenced occasions that breasts were seen were in rape scenes or other violating encounters....
February 2013
3 posts
Starting another company
I own Feminique Boutique, LLC, my sexy little sex shop in West Chester, PA. I just incorporated Dr. Jill, Sexologist, LLC, officially separating my sexuality speaking and writing business. So now I own two companies before the age of 28. I think I’m going to take my 30s off. I’ve worked too much in my 20s.
My Sex Life in Cosmopolitan Magazine
This week sucked. I was sick in bed the whole time. Had to cancel all my appointments. It blew. But there was one notable highlight: Cosmo did a story about my sex life.
I tweeted about a bottle of lube spilling on Ryan’s phone with the hashtag #datingasexologist. A writer for Cosmo read it, thought it would make a great story, and interviewed me for other anecdotes unique to a...
Dating a Sexologist
Ryan called from work and asked, “Can you do me a favor? Can you see if the lube bottle on the bedside table is knocked over?”
It was.
“I thought so”, he said.
His phone wasn’t working and when he opened the back, a slippery, clear, odorless liquid started oozing out. He thought maybe the battery was leaking, or oil from work got on it, but then suspected it was...
January 2013
13 posts
BC
Took my birth control pill tonight not with water, but with red wine. Getting wild and crazy over here on a Wednesday night.
I'm Philly's Official Sexologist!
Very very excited about my new opportunity to be a sex columnist for philly.com! Check out this press release announcing it!
Philly.com Announces Sexologist Dr. Jill McDevitt Joins “The New Voices” Platform of Notable Contributors
PHILADELPHIA (January 28) - Philly.com, the most popular news web site in Philadelphia, announced today that nationally recognized Sexologist Dr. Jill McDevitt...
Sexoholic at 6:30am
I am in sexoholic mode again. Ever since I’ve been working from home to build my sexuality speaking, writing, and media pundit career, I have been ridiculously productive. Working from home helps me get so much done, which helps me get even more excited to get more done.
Yesterday I worked a 9 hour day. Tuesdays are days I concentrate on my in-home sexuality parties, so I did that. Then at...
Happy Birthday Roe v. Wade!
Today is the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade!
This is so important to me as a sexologist, and as a woman, because if you boil it down, women can not be truly free until they can make decisions about their own sexuality, body, and future. Reproductive justice is most imperative to gender equality. Absolutely imperative.
Sarah Weddington is the extraordinary woman who successfully argued the Roe...
Not enough hugging
Yesterday;
Me: How many times a day do you think we hug?
Ryan: (giving it an honest contemplation) Does it count when you straddle me and sit on my lap?
Me: Yeah. Anytime where we are embracing, have our arms around each other.
Ryan: I don’t know, maybe 10, 15 times?
Me: Sounds about right
Today I counted and yep, that’s about right. I like that. I think that’s a nice high...
This will restore your faith in humanity, and then...
It’s been a crazy few days of emails. First I got this lovely email from a stranger in Switzerland. This is the type of email that really restores your faith in humanity! Totally made my day! With the name redacted, it read:
Dear Jill, I came to your youtube-videos by chance, tried to find your website then. I read your first blog post and it made me kinda sad although I don’t really...
The Most Ridiculous Example of Institutional...
Do you see this sign? Getting the permit to hang it took:
$974
8 months
5 town meetings at which I was ridiculed, likened to a pedophile for displaying “pubic hair” (also known as a heart), and recommended for immediate arrest for “corrupting the welfare of a child” (also because of the heart) by members of the community.
3 front page news stories.
1 threat of...
Pretty new sex website
I still operate www.thesexologist.org as my professional website, but I also created a separate new pretty shopping cart website for Feminique where you can view and purchase the 25 bestsellers. Check it out at www.feminiqueshop.com. It’s so pretty!
Go ahead and go shopping!
Who lost a garter strap?
I thought my printer was broke. Turned out a garter strap was stuck in the paper feed roller. This is my life.
LOVE
If you go back far enough, like I explain in my book, it was love that started my interest in sexuality. I wanted a life filled with love, romance, hearts, cuddling, and sappy sweetness. I was obsessed with love my entire young life. It was love that sent me into my high school library in 10th grade to find books of advice on how make love last. In one of the books I found in the library,...
Imitation the Sincerest Form of Flattery My Ass
I’ve had hardship before. I’ve been annoyed before. But I’ve never wanted to give up as much as I do right now. It’s been a long story. I typed it out, then deleted it because it sounded whiny. Here’s the shortened version.
I work my ass off. 90 hour weeks. I work through breakfast. I work through lunch. I work through dinner. I worked that hard while also putting...
Box 69
As you may know, I hired a full time General Manager to run my sex store Feminique so I can dedicate myself full time to my sexology work- writing, speaking, college workshops, in-home parties, blogging, and the like.
So in setting up my home office, I rented a post office box to separate store related mail from sexology related mail. I got box 69. I love my life!
You can now contact me by...
2012- Year in Review
2012 was quite the year for this sexologist. The year started with me producing my own web based sexology reality show, and ended with me hiring someone to run Feminique full time so I can be a full-time sexuality speaker and writer. In 2012, I completed some major career milestones; I presented a sexuality workshop at Harvard University, remodeled my sex shop, had a line out the door for Free...
December 2012
3 posts
Sexologist CV
Now that I’ve finished my Ph.D., I’m looking for an adjunct teaching job for the spring semester.
Updating my CV has been a hoot. I hate my CV. It’s not pretty when you take work experience that is edgy and innovative (feminist sex-positive empowerment through an entertainment model) done in non-traditional grassroots settings (living rooms, sex shops, youtube, tumblr) and try...
Plush STI Pathogens Make Me Smile :)
My life as of late has been…. drama-filled. So much stress and headache, I haven’t blogged about much of it because I don’t even know where to start. There’s the Feminique renovation and museum project that is never ending. There’s the impending headache of round 27 with the borough of West Chester after they denied my sign permit- AGAIN yesterday. I’m been...
November 2012
5 posts
Christmas Shopping While Feminist
I feel like the more and more socially aware I become, the harder and harder it is to enjoy anything, because where I used to laugh I now think, “ugh, that’s so ______________” (fill in the blank, misogynist, racist, homophobic, elitist, rape apologist, first world problemish, etc)
As of an hour ago, I realized I can no longer enjoy Christmas.
This weekend Ryan Tyler and I am...
Jill or Feminique: My Identity Crisis
You may remember I fought tooth and nail to get the Feminique logo on the sign outside of my shop. It’s still not hanging and the reason is because I’ve been contemplating for months now about changing the name of the business.
This is because I don’t know who/what the business is anymore. The name “Feminique” says “retail” to me. Which is many ways,...
Sexual Justice was the Real Winner Last Night
I am one happy sexologist because last night’s election was historically victorious for women, equal marriage, reproductive freedom, and anyone who have ever been raped or is disgusted by rape. Basically, on sexology terms, I couldn’t have written the outcome better myself.
A record number of women were elected to US Senate! Win! This included Tammy Baldwin of Wisconsin, the first...
Sex on the Ballot: Who a Sexologist Endorses for...
Seems many professional organizations are making endorsements for tomorrow’s election. Medical doctors are saying which candidate they believe, in their professional opinion, would be the best on health care. And auto worker unions say who they believe would be best for their profession. Students, soldiers, teachers, so on. So, I’m offering you my professional opinion on the candidate for...
Being a Sex Rock Star (with pics)
Songs by the likes of Bob Seger and The Eagles, songs about life on the road as a rock star, for the first time rang true for me when I heard them this week. Long hours driving, boredom on the road, a different hotel every night, eating a lot of greasy drive in food, spending so much time setting up and taking down equipment compared to how much time is actually spent on stage, forgetting what...
October 2012
1 post
My Absence
If you are wondering why I haven’t written in so long, it’s because I have been on the road, traveling gig to gig like a sex rock star. In the last 13 days, from Oct 13-Oct 25, I have been in 13 states- CA, PA, NJ, NY, DE, CT, RI, MA, MD, VA, TN, GA, and AL, plus Washington D.C. I am exhausted. I am going to take a breath for a few days, then I shall fill you in on my travels.
September 2012
6 posts
Women's Rally in West Chester- A Reflection
A little reflection, if I may, on the women’s rally that was held in West Chester last weekend. Now, I speak several times a week and have spoken in front of thousands and thousands of people, to crowds bigger than were there at the rally. But I was still a pinch nervous because it was my first political speech. My public speaking efforts have largely been for entertainment or education,...
